Over the last three weeks, I’ve lost 10 1/2 pounds and started to get my body, mind, and energy back. Burnout whispered, “I’m coming for you, you better pay attention,” and I heard the whisper but had to back out of a schedule I made for myself in the name of “those who work the hardest win.”
I knew better, so I rescheduled the calendar with time boundaries to give me my miracle morning back, along with time to actually cook real food, not just microwave a burrito. I discovered that the statement “I don’t like to cook” is actually a lie. I don’t like being rushed. When I have the time and space to cook, I really enjoy the connection.
Over about six months prior, I saw my body’s outward expression of my exhaustion and stress. I knew the anxiety wasn’t sustainable. And after trying on ten pairs of pants that were too tight, I thought: This is it. You’re either going to do something about this or not. I couldn’t find a way out until I did.
It started with a four-hour meditation marathon. Guided by one of Silva’s certified instructors, I joined a group online and spent half a Saturday chilling the fuck out. It was divine. I felt my nervous system downshift and practiced getting that to happen in seconds instead of hours. Along with setting a harder boundary on the calendar, I began to feel “normal” again and was ready to start on my nutrition plan.
The clean eating helped detox the visceral fat, and my pants started to feel looser. The morning journaling helped bring awareness to the sugar cravings. Sugar and cheese; I do miss pizza. And asking a friend to be an accountability partner was key to getting over the hump when I felt too hungry.
I watched myself on days I felt hungry. My mind knew I had enough calories that day. My body reacted and tried to remind me: You’ll starve if you don’t eat. Water became a go-to. And writing down my thoughts, observations, and a special poem (below) helped me see that I was connecting with something important again, something that would be a place I could count on moving forward.
You Were Born for More
What’s inside, little girl?
What’s hiding in the corners
of your mind,
the crevices of your crystalline
connections, hardened by time?
Can you feel the strain,
a breaking point
before the pain arrives?
Are you listening to the whispers
gasping from the lips of your soul?
What’s inside, little girl?
What kind of hardening are you used to now?
How has your flow accommodated
restricting your range of motion
as you reach for your dreams?
Are you remembering to stretch past
the tightness?
Are you brave enough
to challenge those borders
and travel into uncertain places?
Or are you staying safe?
I don’t blame you, little girl.
It’s nicer there.
Easier.
Warmer.
But you weren’t born for nicer,
in case you didn’t already know,
you were born for more.
That drive you feel
burning on rocket fuel? That’s real.
Don’t let anyone try to convince you
otherwise.
Little girl, what’s stopping you?
Use your tools.
Sit quietly in the stillness with only you.
Let the beat of your heart
start the rhythm of your masterpiece today.
Let the easy pace
of your breath
steady your stance.
Hear the call from within
a little louder.
Take a chance and spin a tale that makes
wonder and awe
routine.
Plan to be seen; It’s okay.
You were born to be seen,
for every single thing
you dream of
to manifest.
Leave the past behind
and find the cool ease
of now
where the how sits waiting
to be uncovered.
Every answer waits
to be discovered.
The peace you crave
patiently stays in hopes
of your arrival.
Take your next inhale
and make a vow to yourself
to step into the version
of the goddess
born to change the world
She’s worthy
and loved
and seen and heard
and cherished
and adored. . .
. . . we’re counting on her
to want more.
Never be afraid
of what you’re inspired to do.
Something bigger is in charge.
Time to let go and surrender;
Hand the doubt, worry, fear,
and anxiety over.
Focus on the light inside,
the big love in your life.
Take a breath
Take a step
Trust in your direction
Let your heart lead
and walk through that door.
Little girl, it’s all inside of you.
The next-level self-care I incorporated over the last few weeks solidified into a kind of dealbreaker moment for me. I felt the conviction inside. “I won’t betray you again,” I whispered to my Self.
“You must embrace leadership if you want to grow your business.” I listened to one of the “laws” I’m learning about generational wealth and had a moment of clarity about leadership. It’s all the things we think of when it comes to other people. But what does it mean for us? Where does leadership begin? It begins with a body-mind-soul who takes care of themself with the start of every single day prioritized to honor the sacred vessel we walk around doing all our world-changing leadership-y things in.
This starts with you.
How are you feeling today?
When I opened up the journal on day one of my nutrition plan, I started with the prompt, I feel __________.
That was the beginning of something really good. It can be simple and easy.
You were born for more. It’s time to connect with that spark and step into your dreams.
